Kat Nieh is a dating clarity coach that empowers frustrated and discouraged singles to get clear about who and what they want in a relationship to boost their dating confidence and gain actionable tools to manifest their ideal partner and cocreate their dream relationship that lasts.
Prior to becoming a coach, she was a burnt-out workaholic who left the tech industry and her 12-year design career―honing her resourcefulness, creatively thinking outside of the box, and developing effective solutions to problem solve and navigate through challenges. She traveled the world and infused herself in diverse modalities to congruently become her best self, intentionally create a life she loves, and consciously be a better partner.
She deeply believes in what’s possible for her clients and empowers them to discover the answers within themselves by leveraging her Avatar Manifestation Method™. You can download her free guide with the 5 secrets to supercharge your love manifestation skills at www.thoughtfullykat.com/manifest or follow her on Instagram at @thoughtfullykat.
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You create your first impression
No matter where you are in the world, who you are, and how you identify yourself, the first impression you make on others is through the way you adorn yourself. Why? Because the first sense everyone uses is visual.
Before you even say a word to your date, you’re already making an impression by the way you dress. Then it’s how you carry yourself through your posture, the way you walk, how you move your body, and your facial expressions. All those little things are saying something about who you are, your confidence level, and your overall vibes. Your date has already determined within those first 90 seconds of meeting you, whether they’re attracted to you or not by taking in all those little data points to create an overall impression of you.
All that is happening before you even said a word.
You might think that the words on your dating profile might help you out a little, but they’re all still judging you based on your photos first. Both men AND women are visual beings.
Tailor your first impression effectively through clothing
So how can you increase the chances of making a good impression while still being yourself in the process?
Well, before I tell you, let me address that question with this two-fold answer first.
Your confidence level influences what you choose to wear. What you wear also influences your confidence level. So let those two elements enhance each other to boost how you show up.
Wear something that makes you feel good. Choose an outfit that lights you up and makes you want to check yourself out in the mirror. We all have an outfit like that. (If not, you know who can help you find that.)
Don’t just go for “comfortable” or “good enough”. That mediocre or just ok energy will translate into how you carry yourself.
When you pick something that brings you joy, your confidence level rises and that makes you feel even better. Think of that feedback loop as an endless cycle that spirals upwards. That energy you give off is magnetic and attractive.
Take note that I didn’t tell you exactly what to wear. I mentioned picking an outfit that makes you feel good, lights you up, and brings you joy.
The secret ingredient to great first impressions
It’s the personal energy you bring to the date that increases your chance of making a good impression while still being yourself in the process.
Even if they made a snap judgment of you in the first 90 seconds, your personal energy could favorably change or improve upon that initial impression. Think of those people you’ve met who were surprisingly charismatic and have this alluring and captivating effect on others. What you’ve experienced is being enveloped by their personal energy, which is cultivated from knowing who they are, believing in their worth, and congruently showing up as themselves.
You can also boost your personal energy by doing the following:
- Set aside dedicated time to put your work brain away and mentally prepare yourself for the date by visualizing how you’d like the date to go.
- Look yourself in the mirror, smile, and repeatedly compliment yourself for a few minutes. Tell yourself the things you love about yourself.
- Listen, dance, and sing to some of your favorite upbeat songs as you get ready or drive to the date. Take note of the lyrics and make sure they’re positive and encouraging as those are all subliminal messages you’re telling your conscious and unconscious minds.
Whether you’re conscious of it or not, working with a personal or wardrobe stylist can help boost your personal energy. When you wear something that represents who you are and enhances your favorite attributes, you elevate your energy, your confidence, and your charisma.
That’s why confident and charismatic people find their favorite or signature way to adorn themselves through their clothes, shoes, accessories, hairstyle, makeup, and even using scents, too. They’ll appreciate the compliments, but it’s mostly how it makes THEM feel inside. That energy enhances their confidence, attraction, and magnetism.
So the next time you need a quick and easy way to give yourself a confidence boost and feel good about yourself, put on something that makes you feel like your best self and watch how your energy shifts immediately.
For more tips on boosting your dating confidence through planning your wardrobe, read Abby’s post here.
Know that you can easily change how you feel in an instant.